What about the dog that tried biting your penis off?
Mmmmmm, that's not exactly right. I'd just moved in with the lady who owned him. And I was, in the morning, out in the backyard taking a whizz. The dog was just trying to show me this was his house, I think. He did actually take my cock in his mouth. But he was very gentle about it. He just wanted to show me, he didn't wanna bite it off. I think he knew I'd just made it with his mistress. That's why he aimed at that, probably. He was a huge dog. Biggest Newfoundland I've ever seen. I punched him in the head. But we got to be great buddies, me and that dog. Great buddies. I mean, I loved that guy. But, I'm part Irish. That's the way a lotta Irishmen begin their relationships.
WTF!? Other stories he tells include the time he was hopped up on peyote and wandered naked around a neighborhood, breaking into peoples homes, painting artwork, and playing the piano while covered in blood. A couple of years ago, I read this book that he wrote. Man, this guy is whack. I <3 David Carradine. Kung Fu rocks!